Saturday, March 15, 2008

How to catch, keep, and feed a Leprechaun



St. Patricks Day is almost here. What does that mean? Get your Leprechaun traps out. So to catch a Leprechaun you first need to know a bit about the Leprechaun.

  • They are really small. A wee bit smaller than a G.I. Joe.

  • They always where alot of green. To camouflage themselves in the grass.

  • They can not leave the grass, or they will die. Unless they see a rainbow at which point they can go anywhere, and they can fly.

  • They prefer well maintained lawns.

  • They are uncontrollably pulled to the scent of 4 leaf clover's.

  • They are very disgusting and vile creatures. They spit, curse, burp, and a whole lot more.

  • They are most abundant on the eve of St. Patrick's Day.

  • They are only male.

  • They eat soups composed of grasses, which they boil in a wee little pot.

  • They fall asleep instantly when it is dark and can not wake up for hours.

  • They can not resist the smell of Lemon Grass.

  • They are allergic to all house pets.

  • They are disgusted by poor penmanship.

  • They are really stupid.

  • They hate large open areas.

  • They are really really really fast. Don't expect to see them unless you have one enclosed and watch him for a long time.

  • They love gold.

  • They love Rainbow's.

So now that you know a little. How do you catch one?

You will need the following item's.

  • Some type of box preferably small. Like a pop tart box.

  • Lemon Grass. If you don't have this type then golf course grass or even lawn grass will work.

  • A stick about 6 inches high.

  • A bright green crayon or marker.

  • Great hand writing.

  • 4 leaf clover stickers.

So with those few things you or anyone can catch a Leprechaun. Here are the steps.

  1. Find a spot on your lawn where your pets do not go.

  2. Place the stick in the ground 1/2" deep.

  3. Color the box green.

  4. Write on the box Leprechaun rest station & pull stick to get gold coin.

  5. Place the box so that one side is supported by the ground and one is supported by the stick. This should allow enough clearance.

  6. Place loose grass inside.

  7. Place the stickers all over the box and even in the yard. Make a couple trails with them leading to the box.

  8. Now wait, just remember to do it inside. If he sees you he will run.

After you catch him don't move the box until you have a cage for him. He will sleep there indefinitely.

So you caught him. Now how do you keep him? A hamster cage is the best idea. Place grass all over the floor of the cage. When adding new grass be careful not to let him out. Always cover the cage before opening it so he will be asleep. Toss him a gold coin once in awhile, it will make him happy. Most importantly do not I repeat DO NOT let him see a Rainbow. Rainbow's make Leprechauns nuts and give them powers like flying. He will surely escape if this happens.

To feed him simply use scissors and cut some really pretty grass. Place it in a bowl and leave it in the sunlight for 32 minutes. Remember they are small they cant handle microwave hot. Now if you want to see something silly poor some pepper in the bowl before you give it to him. When he goes to eat it he will sneeze uncontrollably and bounce around the cage. Don't worry he will not be hurt, he may curse and spit at you though.

So post pictures of your traps in the comments of this post. GOOD LUCK



-RIGHTTTT



Just Do It!

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